Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
She said her name was "party"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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