I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
