physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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