listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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