his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
