My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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