ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
