Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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