I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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