More tranny stories later!
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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