I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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