Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
