I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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