I am full of burrito and curiosity
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
