it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
