You work out of a Hotel?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize