All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
