out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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