sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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