if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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