i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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