Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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