taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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