Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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