Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
