Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
