Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
