I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
