If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
he fucked my hip out of place.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
