I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize