i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
