ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize