why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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