I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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