so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
you had me at cake vodka
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
