just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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