Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
