he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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