Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
