Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
