I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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