And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just want nice things and good sex
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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