No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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