We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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