Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
