wakey wakey hands off snakey
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
