out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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