last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Just high enough for therapy.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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