I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize