I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
