You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
