my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I skipped work to stalk him.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
