If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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